DO-IT-YOURSELF-STRIPPER KIT
With your own dance pole the possibilities are endless!! You can boogie on down in the living room, spice things up in the bedroom or even liven up a friend's party!!
(Suggested by John "Pimp Daddy" Sharbrough)

OH NO! HE DIDN'T?!?
"Much like supernut Ann Coulter, Rush Limbaugh is such an offensive clown on a regular basis that it takes something pretty special from him these days before non-wingers bother to pay attention to, much less get riled over, his inflammatory gasbagging. But accusing former teen hearthrob Michael J. Fox of faking his Parkinson's symptoms in an ad the actor taped for Missouri Senate candidate and stem-cell-research proponent Claire McCaskill pretty much did the trick. Faster than you can say 'big fat idiot,' the Internet was abuzz over what a moronic bastard Limbaugh is, with the mainstream media seizing the story and spreading it far beyond online chatter.
(NEW REPUBLIC)

ALABAMA ARREST FOR BLOCKING TRAFFIC
This falls into the "why does a dog lick his balls?" category, but it is still funny as hell.
(Suggested by Bill Pfeiffer)

LIBERTARIAN WRITE-IN CANDIDATE'S "PLATFORM"
Well, here's a candidate that has me pondering my decision to just pull one lever this November. You can order a T-Shirt with her picture on it that has her catchphrase on it: "Better These Boobs, Than These Boobs" (pictures of the other candidates displayed) on her website.
(Suggested by JOE PAUL)